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Being Connected or Disconnected: Coming from LOVE or "???"

We've all had that feeling of "being connected". This could be described as "coming from a place of love" or "being in your power". Perhaps it's when we're with a significant other, playing with a child, performing at work, or doing something you're confident at. This isn't necessarily "romantic in-love"...it's just open, warm and giving to others. You're confident and centered in yourself. Unconditional love and acceptance. Isn't this the energy we'd like to live from all the time??

Truth-Telling Game

Intimacy is one of the most fulfilling aspects of relating with another. In opening oneself and revealing your innermost thoughts to another creates intimacy, understanding and deepens any relationship. The feeling of "being known" and "knowing another" authentically is fulfilling. One fun way to stir up the intimacy quotient is by playing the "Truth-Telling Game". It’s simple and easy, but not for the faint of heart. It’s about connecting to your truth in the moment, and then sharing that with another

HAI Principles
HAI - Human Awareness Institute - If you are intrigued with the idea of opening your heart more fully, moving past fears around intimacy, healing core relationships, getting beyond issues of body image or packaging, becoming more comfortable with both men and women, and/or would like to learn how to "love" people without necessarily "liking" their behavior, I highly recommend their program.

About Sales, JV Partners and Wet, Sloppy Kisses
Do you hate sales, or have a lukewarm affinity to it? What if sales wasn't such a big deal? Could you then fall in love (or at least like) with it? This lighthearted account shows you how to approach your prospective clients or Joint Venture partners in a fun, authentic, and effective way.

Referrals: Now They\'re Asking and You\'re Making

As entrepreneurs and salespeople, referrals are our lifeblood because they jumpstart the trust-building with potential customers, partners and suppliers. In my last column I wrote about the oft-forgotten sales and networking tactic of asking our customers for referrals. Now, let's switch hats for a moment. What happens when we're the ones receiving the request? It's certainly a familiar situation, because we're as well-connected as they come.

Instant Intimacy
Whether your goal is to sell more widgets or make more friends, you'll be more successful the quicker you can connect with people. And of course, the more intimate the connection, the better. So let's discuss how you can capitalize on the many brief interactions at your next conference or social gathering.

You Cant Get There Alone
It's About Results!

Tools of the Trade: LinkedIn
In most of my speaking and writing about building relationships for success, I focus on helping people acquire a relationship mindset through understanding and practicing four fundamental principles.

When a book is finished
It takes a long time to finish a book. Even after it’s done it isn’t finished. It lingers in you for a long, long time. Even then, after you think it’s gone, it isn’t.

The Formula that Changes EVERYTHING
It seems that everywhere you turn these days, you hear people talking about the economy.

Slash Your Marketing Budget
As CMO at Deloitte and then Starwood, I hated it when other marketers measured themselves by the size of their budgets.

Zip it!
Admit it: You like to gossip. Who doesn't? Gossip is popular for the same reason that shows like Desperate Housewives are hits. It's cheap entertainment that lets us escape into someone else's problems rather than confront our own. Gossip is often a form of schadenfreude - delighting in someone else's misfortune.

Create a Genius Factory
A recent New Yorker article about the wild success of Nathan Myhrvold's company Intellectual Ventures got me thinking on the blog about group problem solving -- an incredible tool for innovation and rapid progress. Group problem solving can help out in the workplace or in those great peer-to-peer networks that I believe are instrumental to success.

Trade Show Tidbits
Instead of a brochure, hand out a one-page fact sheet. Do a pre-show promotion because 33% of people attending a show do so because of a promotion.

The Magic Formula to Better Results: It's Your Response that Counts
In today's economic times, when everywhere you look there’s a rumbling of great uncertainty, I think we should all take a pause (and a deep breath) to think about our lives.

Book Review: A Master Class in Gremlin Taming: The Absolutely Indispensable Next Step for Freeing Yourself from the Monster of the Mind

Rick Carson’s Taming your Gremlin is a classic book of self-development, written over 25 years ago. It has helped hundreds of thousands quiet negative voices in their heads that hold them back. Although Rick has revised the original work, his Master Class goes deeper with new techniques for freeing yourself from the “Monster of the Mind”. Rather than focusing on what’s going on in our heads, the Master Class is more focused on being genuine with ourselves and responsible in our relationships. His writing couldn’t be more clear, his techniques more elegant, practical and effective for achieving intimacy with yourself and others in your life. Time and time he reminds us to focus our awareness and being aware of our breath. So let’s take this one breath at a time.

4 Fantastic Ways to Spark Romance and Intimacy in Your Relationship
There are many fantastic ways to spark romance and intimacy in your relationship that are simple, inexpensive and virtually guaranteed to bring back that lovin’ feeling. Here are four of my favorites. The most important thing is to take a chance to re-ignite the flames of passion and love in your relationship.

7 Ways to Avoid Money Fights in Your Relationship
Money makes the world go round. It’s also is the number one reason why couples fight. Here are 7 ways or guidelines for handling money issues throughout your relationship so you don’t have to end up fighting about money, whether you are dealing with the richer or poorer times in your relationship.

Live Happily Ever After with Realistic Expectations

We all think we’re going to fall in love with Prince (or Princess) Charming and live the rest of our days together in a Disney fairytale “happily ever after.” I don’t know anyone who has lived “happily ever after” all day, every day, day in and day out as the Disney fairytale romances suggest. However, you can live happily ever after if your relationship is based upon realistic expectations.

Stress and Sex: 5 Stressors that Can Put Your Libido on Hold

Some people are capable of doing many things well while under stress, but being in the mood for sex and/or feeling sexy usually isn’t one of them. Stress is pretty high up there as one of the top reasons for why couples are not having sex! Here are 5 common stressors that might be getting in the way of, or actually completely killing, your sex drive. And good news – there are solutions to each!

Don’t Think of your Goals, Think From your Goals
A slight but profound change to think from you’re goal. This is one of those subtle but fine points that makes all the difference in the world.

The 600-pound Gorilla: How to Reduce Money Fights in a Relationship
Few issues bring out the worst in relationships and couples like money; in fact, it’s the number one reason couples fight. Couples rarely address their emotions associated with money, and so it usually becomes the 600-pound gorilla in the relationship. Here are a few tips to help you address your 600-pound gorilla:

Boomers are Changing the World AGAIN
A key trend in American business is the rise of the Baby Boomer small business entrepreneur.

5 Tips to Get Your Relationship Through the Holidays
A dirty little secret about the holidays is that many relationships do not survive them. Many couples break up during the holidays because all the stress gets under their skin and they can’t take it anymore. Below are five easy and highly effective tips to help get your relationship through the holidays.

Make Up Instead of Break Up: Holiday Relationship Tips
Sometimes holiday stress can be too much for a relationship. If you feel your relationship is teetering on the edge, here are five effective and very do-able relationship tools you can use now to prevent a relationship break up.

Mirror Mirror on the Wall: The Secret & Most Effective Relationship Tool
Mirrors reveal truths that we are not always willing to see when we look into them. And the mirror is – beyond a shadow of a doubt – the secret, most effective relationship tool you must have that holds the key for rekindling love and romance in your relationship.

Manifesting the Best of Both Worlds
We often don't realize how we compromise our life enjoyment by believing in limited possibilities. This is your official invite (with tutorial) to drop the constraints and enjoy the best of both worlds!

Relationships: Cheating
Why do people cheat in their relationships? Discover the underlying reasons for cheating and for openly having an affair.

Keeping the Love Alive: Maintaining Good Feelings in Any Kind of Relationship (Part 1 of 2)
In general, our culture confuses sacrifice with love, teaching us the virtue of loving others more than ourselves. So we attempt to demonstrate or prove love with sacrifice, and we get upset or feel unloved if others won't sacrifice for us. Yet sacrifice is a wheel that crushes everyone who gets on it.

3 Ways to De-Stress Your Life & Your Relationship in 2011
Many of us make a toast to health and happiness in the New Year. One great way to improve your health in 2011 is to reduce stress. Here are three ways to de-stress your life and relationship this year.

3 Easy Ways to Shape-up Your Relationship This New Year
Did you make a New Year's Resolution? There’s no reason why you can’t make a resolution dedicated to your relationship. Let’s make 2011 the best year ever for your relationship. Here are three great ways to get your relationship in shape.

5 Easy Ways to Heat Up the Flames of Love & Passion on Valentine's Day
February 14th – Valentine’s Day – is the official love day of the year. Anyone in any type of romantic relationship must honor this day – in one way or another. Here are 5 easy ways to heat up the flames of passion and love on Valentine’s Day to show your partner how you feel about them!

How to Create a Romantic Valentine’s Day Bedroom Using Your 5 Senses
If you are looking for a fun and exciting way to spice up your bedroom on Valentines Day, why not start with your five senses? Creating a sensory, romantic ambiance with your five senses is sure to put an exclamation point at the end of your Valentine’s Day.

5 More Easy Ways to Heat Up the Flames of Love & Passion on Valentine's Day, and EVERY Day!
Even if February 14th crept up on you, you still have time to make this month your best ever! Here are five more ways to make Valentine's Day, and every day, passionate and romantic!

A Life Worth Living

To achieve your Core Desires-whether they are earning more money, enjoying more intimacy, or having more joy in your life-you need to grow, become more, learn, and change. How fast you grow is within your control; you can experience great growth if you desire it. But you can't just sense a need to change; you can't "sorta" want to be more or have more. If you are willing to grow, life as you have known it will never be the same.

Three Rules for Relational Success

To create closeness and intimacy with other people-male or female, young or old, family or friends-apply the following three rules in any circumstance. 1. Be willing to trust that others will not hurt you. You must take the risk of being let down, ignored, manipulated, judged, or hurt. Even if it is risky, share your real feelings. The closer you are with someone, the more of you they can see. When you are close to someone's heart, or they to yours, you can see each other's concerns more easily. This can be risky when you don't know what they will do with what they see. That is where trust comes in.

Spring is the Perfect Time for a Relationship Make-Over: 3 Simple tips to Brighten and Rejuvenate Your Love Life
Like our house or yard, our relationships also require a good Spring cleaning! All too often we let the familiarity of day-to-day life blind us to those small things that can have a big impact on the health and satisfaction of ourselves and our partners. Following these three simple steps will ensure you stay engaged and excited throughout the entire year.

TRUST YOUR PARTNER IMPLICITLY – OR don’t be in the relationship!
Simply put, intimacy, love and trust go together. In order to be intimate (physically, emotionally or spiritually), we have to let our guard down and be vulnerable. This requires a sense of emotional safety on both sides, and a belief that our partner will not betray or intentionally hurt us.

How Magnetic Are Your Goals?
Having a strong vision for your personal and business life is crucial in attaining your goals. But before setting that vision, I’m here to challenge you to first identify your values and then set goals in alignment with those values AND your vision. Goals that honor our values get results!

Time, Money and Life-Balance, Part 3 Life-Balance
Happiness comes from life balance. Happiness comes from a disciplined and reasoned approach to the "big pieces" in life. If time management is the essential first step, and if managing money is a critical second step, the third step to happiness is living a balanced life.

Two Secrets to Creating Abundance NOW!

The first secret to creating abundance is learning what abundance isn’t. Abundance is not happiness. Abundance is not determined by our bank account, the square footage of our home, or the make of our car. If it were, then we would see wealthier people behave as though they are happier and the middle class demonstrating signs of misery. Yet hundreds of experiments show unequivocally that, once basic needs for comfort have been met at a modest, middle class level, the correlation between wealth and happiness disappears. Poof! Chasing after money in the hope that it will buy us more happiness, intimacy, or fulfillment is a waste of energy based on an invalid hypothesis.

Creating a Strong Internal Brand: You Can Take it to the Bank
Creating and nurturing a strong internal brand - and the employee engagement that it creates - seems to the overriding "secret sauce" shared by leading companies across industry sector. And these leaders have figured out that the strong internal brand doesn't simply result in a nice place to work - it has financial rewards as well.

Seeing Perfection without Judgment

Happiness does not depend on outward things, but on the way we see them. Leo Tolstoy Do we hold a vision of perfection in our life? Taking in an exquisite sunset, gazing at the ocean waves, smelling pine trees in a forest, gives us a feeling or sense of perfection and beauty. We can experience perfection when we watch a child laugh and play, or as we complete an exciting project we worked on. Yet there are many times when perfection seems like a far off dream; something we can't quite grasp. We become caught up in the struggle of a situation, or frustrated because someone else doesn't seem to live up to our expectations. We may criticize our self because we are not attractive enough, funny enough, bright enough, or as resourceful as we think we should be.

Scrooged A Dickens of a Way to Manage Change
Managing change in our lives and in our businesses is vital in the modern environments in which we live. There is much to learn from that old and cantankerous Dickens character, Mr Ebenezer Scrooge himself...

Creating Boundaries or Barriers – Where do You Hang Out?
What I’ve seen as a professional coach is that much of our personal power (‘claiming our life as our own’) relies on setting clear boundaries – listening to our own values, asking for help, and knowing what we want and don’t want. There’s an art to setting boundaries that do not become barriers to love and closeness.

What Is A Life Coach

Dear Jane, What is a life coach and how do I know if I need one? What I do as a life coach is help my clients recognize and let go of the sabotaging thoughts and behaviors that have undermined their success, joy, and intimacy. We all have sabotaging thoughts and behaviors; sometimes it takes someone else to help us see them and to believe in us more than we believe in ourselves. So I’m also an energetic cheerleader and true believer. I will often see the possibilities for a client’s future before he or she can. My job is to inspire each person I work with to create an extraordinary vision and to become adept with the tools to create that vision.

Intimacy and Connection - The Aliveness of Life
Do you want to experience intimacy and connection with others, and the joy and aliveness that this offers? You need to start by learning how to love yourself, rather than abandon yourself.

Make Change Easy Get Involved
The level and intimacy of involvement in change makes a big difference to how people are able to respond. Taking 'control' of change can be fruitful, enlightening and, yes, enjoyable. If you are undergoing change, think it through, and then think how you can enable your people to get involved too...

Emotional intimacy - The Essential Daily Requirement for the health and longevity of your relationship.
“Into-me-you-see” Without intending to stereotype the genders, as soon as I sent out a “survey” and asked people to share their views on intimacy, somehow most of the women sent in their feelings of what Intimacy means to them on an emotional level and most of you guys out there sent me stuff that made me blush.

Physical Affection Can Help You Manage Work Stress
We have always joked about how uptight work colleagues are in desperate need of a good roll in the hay but now Swiss research is proving that physical intimacy at home can drastically reduce your stress levels at work...

Healing the Fear of Intimacy
Are you sick of being afraid of intimacy? Are you ready to have the wonderful experience of emotional intimacy in your life?

What a Pole Vaulter Can Teach You About Professional Networking
Here’s an insight about building intimacy that I shared on yesterday’s Relationship Masters Academy coaching call.

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