resentment

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There are many things that prevent us from accomplishments. As we know the list is miles long and is constantly added to. Any excuse we want will be supplied to us. All we need to do is procrastinate a few minutes and a world of reasons not to begin will arise. There is no cause to make a list we each have our own. The problem I see today is one that may not seem prevalent and often hides behind others we use. It is the anxiety and resentment that comes from not forgiving.

Blaming Others
You might not wish to hear this but, YOU are responsible for much of what is happening in your life and your life, is your responsibility! Unfortunately, nobody is coming to save you!

Resentment
When we feel resentment we believe that someone, or something has wronged us in some way. When we feel resentful, we tend to feel negative emotions such as anger, spite, hurt and irritation.

Releasing the past
Are you carrying deep hurts from the past? Has someone made you angry, betrayed you or hurt your heart? Sometimes we hang onto resentment because it is the only thing we have left

Moms Not Working
For years, career women have heard that it’s fine for them to quit their jobs in order to become stay-at-home moms. They’re told that it’s the best thing for their children and eventually they can make their way back into the workforce when their kids get old enough.

The Second Deadly Workplace Sin: Envy
Recently, I read an article from Careerbuilder.com about the Seven Deadly Workplace Sins. Two days ago, I gave you my take on Pride. This morning, it’s all about Envy.

The Seventh Deadly Workplace Sin: Lust
Recently, I read an article from Careerbuilder.com about the Seven Deadly Workplace Sins. Last time, I gave you my take on Gluttony. Finally, it’s all about Lust.

How Do We Interact With Others?
This question has plagued people for years and many times it is the basis of feelings of resentment and distrust. We will always have interactions with others but the end result is where the importance is realized.

Forgiveness: The Intelligent Choice

To forgive someone is to waive our right to resentment, anger or other negative reaction to something they have done that justifies our response. This is not about condoning or excusing their actions, but about intentionally deciding to let go of a sense of offense at snubs, ego scuffs, disappointments and other garden variety occurrences that pull our strings. Making forgiveness a part of our operating system is a key aspect of emotional intelligence: it is taking ownership of our own emotional reactions. This article provides 7 useful tips for practicing forgiveness.

How Would You Rate Your B-B-A Ability?

B-B-A is an acronym for bounce back ability. Your bounce back ability is the amount of time it takes you to move through, recover from, or let go of the negativity attached to any given circumstance or situation. Things that stand in our way of our B-B-A are things like resentment, guilt, shame, unforgiveness, etc. The quicker we can move through our negative emotions, the faster our B-B-A is. Check out the B-B-A Scale in the following article to determine where you are at and where you can go from here.

Put An Issue On the Table
Every day we find ourselves having to work through issues that come up in our relationships. Opportunities to express your concerns or opinions are never too far away. But, do you act on those opportunities or shy away from them? What is the one thing you should do to improve the quality of those relationships?

THE PERMISSION MODEL
This article was first published in Training Journal as part of the series by Carol Wilson identifying the tools and models frequently used during coaching projects, of which Learning & Development Directors and Corporate Coaches will find it useful to be aware. It is reproduced by kind permission.

How Do You Deal With Disappointment?
I am sure that you have had your own share of disappointments. Perhaps you are working through one (or several) right now. Disappointment is an emotion we feel when we don't get the outcome we want or expect. How are you going to deal with disappointment?

A story of inspiration and action for marketers

I love the John Jackson wakeup call in the morning in our business. Some of us need coffee, tea whatever it takes to perk you up first thing in the morning. For me it is the cup of leadership .This morning was no different except we all witnessed John tell a very heart rendering story about his dad who passed away 11 years ago and he became very emotional at one point as he fondly remembered his dad. There were many lessons to be learned from this story and I will share a few of the highlight moments of that call with you.

When You Want to Sabotage your Successful Home Based Internet Business
Why would someone deliberately sabotage their own business? You may not even be aware of your ability to sub-consciously ensure your failure in your home based online business. The combination of a negative outlook and poor discipline can have lethal consequences for your enterprise.

Punching Yourself Until They Give Up
The midlife transition is all about transforming your life from the externally-motivated value system of the adult to the internally- (that means spiritually-) motivated life that characterizes the mature individual. One key factor in this transformation — a factor that is way too often neglected — is doing a moral housecleaning.

Delegation - What is the role of a Manager?
Are you reluctant to let go of tasks because you fear someone else will do them better? People that struggle to delegate often stock pile their knowledge. They aren’t good at sharing skills, as they like to feel that they are needed. Being successful does not mean being that best at everything, but knowing when to use the right people to help.

Keeping the Love Alive: Selfing, the Cure for Resentment (Part 2 of 2)
When your world is filled with many wonderful opportunities, it can feel difficult if you feel you must choose between them, and it's equally rough if you have a hard time saying no to people. Yet saying yes to everything can lead to both over-commitment and resentment, which can erode your relationships, whether at work or home or in your community.

Keeping the Love Alive: Maintaining Good Feelings in Any Kind of Relationship (Part 1 of 2)
In general, our culture confuses sacrifice with love, teaching us the virtue of loving others more than ourselves. So we attempt to demonstrate or prove love with sacrifice, and we get upset or feel unloved if others won't sacrifice for us. Yet sacrifice is a wheel that crushes everyone who gets on it.

Hidden Costs and Benefits of Conflict Management
This article discusses the costs of unmanaged conflict and how a conflict management system can save money.

Taxes The Good News and the Bad News For Increasing Business Productivity
Cost to do business extends far beyond the standard fix costs of rent, utilities, insurance, etc. How you address these costs has a direct bearing on your sales to profits to employee retention.

Build A Healthy Corporate Culture
Building a healthy corporate culture is key to the success of your business. In today's society, everyone wants their work environment and employees to be like family. While this is a great idea, your business should be careful with approaching this concept. You want to build a happy and successful family, not a dysfunctional one. "How do I go about doing this," you ask? Well read on!

Overcoming the Fear of Change
Change is inevitable – everybody knows that. Still, most people seem to resist change even if it’s positive. In today’s business environment, nothing stays the same for very long, so those who are unable to effectively “ride the waves” will likely find themselves drowning. Here are ten tips to help you navigate in a changing world.

Don't Expect Gratitude from All Customers
For customers who pay you and even love who you do for them, you want to stay with them for as long as you run your business. But, for other customers who treat you as their interim "Fire Department," just do your work and let go. You'd be a happier person, not merely a successful one.

The Chakra System
Chakra is a Sanskrit word that means “wheel”. The Chakra system is the belief that the body has seven spinning wheels of energy from head to toe, and each wheel offers life lessons to advance our souls if we choose to uncover them. The Chakra's are mapped out in the palms of our hands.

Email Newsletters
Choose Wisely and get help!

Build Prosperity and Strong Relationships With L.O.V.E

I had the honour recently of interviewing Evelyn Tian. Evelyn is a Singaporean woman living in Australia. She shared a story that started with volunteering to pack and send envelopes for the 2000 Olympics Committee here in Australia 10 years ago. That simple act of giving lead to an amazing trail of events that lead to her becoming the African Attache for the Olympics and Para-Olympics. This started Evelyn on an incredible journey to Africa for 6 months where she worked with disabled women and children, introducing wheelchair sports and fund raising for home made wheelchairs. She is now working toward helping disabled orphans in Africa.

Social Disease

I have always subscribed to the philosophy of “work hard - play hard”. But I always separated my play FROM my work. What I am referring to is my resistance to socialize with my employees or management peer groups as I worked my way up the corporate ladder. There is an inherent danger in creating a social environment within the workspace that spreads to the after work space. This almost ALWAYS ends badly. Here is my list of No-No’s:

Change: Will You Resist With Terror or Embrace With Wonder?
Life is one long experience of change. Sometimes it's change we welcome. Sometimes it's change we step into apprehensively; and at other times, it's change we fight tooth and nail. The reality is that experiencing change in your life is a certainty. Whether your experience of change is one of terror or wonder is a choice.

Here and Now
Are you capable of letting things go easily; like water rolling off of a duck's back? Can you put things in the past and let them remain there? Are you predominantly temper-free? If so you're in the minority. I'm sure you've heard the saying "Live life in the present." It's one of the best pieces of advice for obtaining and maintaining a happy, healthy, and prosperous life.

I use to believe that there was only one way to handle disappointments and that was with feeling resentful, angry, victimized, discourage, hurt, disempowered and it would send me into a downward, negative turn that had the potential to keep me stuck for a very long time. From this place I felt powerless and hopeless. Then one day I got real tired of feeling hopeless and powerless and started to seach for new ways to handle my life. I discovered some very cool and amazing tools that have changed forever the way that I choose to handle disappointments. If you are interested in knowing about these tools, please read on. Elizabeth

Work Life Balance: C.P.R. for a Balanced Life
Do you feel over-worked and under-appreciated? Are you struggling to balance work & family? Are you too busy taking care of everyone but never have time for yourself? Whether you want to have more balance, more inner peace, or more time for yourself, I offer these tips in my signature workshop "C.P.R. for a Balanced Life".

COMMUNICATE YOUR PROSPERITY INTENTION

If you have chosen prosperity as a way of life, understanding and communicating that intention is an important tool for living in prosperity. It will help you bring your inner intention of prosperity out into the world. Knowing how to communicate that intention is sometimes the first obstacle people face in making conscious life changes. This article gives you concrete steps for communicating your prosperity intention authentically and effectively. Remember, great results take a strong commitment.

COMMUNICATE YOUR INTENTION
If you have decided to make the changes necessary to build a perfect life for yourself - as you define it - you need to bring that inner intention out into the world. This is often the first obstacle people face in making conscious life changes and can sometimes stop change dead in its tracks. Great results take a strong commitment.

7 Secrets to Co-creative Success
Did you make a New Year’s resolution in January to make this your best year ever? Now, that the year is almost gone, you’re probably questioning what’s going wrong and why your dreams are not beginning to manifest!

4 Vital Negotiating Behaviours
A skilled negotiator will create high levels of rapport and be sensitive and empathetic to the people they are negotiating with, yet can still be hard on the issues. The ability to separate the people from the issues and recognise that negotiations, are often fraught with emotional intensity can help sharpen the focus on the interests of the other party to better balance perceptions.

How To Go From Mid Level Manager To Top Level Manager In 12 Months
These articles come in a six part series: 1) The essence of managing 2) Re-engineer yourself to be a manager 3) How to go from employee to supervisor in 6 months 4) How to go from supervisor to entry level manager in 6 months 5) How to go from entry level manager to mid level manage in 6 months 6) How to go from mid level manager to top-level manager in 12 months

Coaching Tip: Stop “Shoulding” Yourself

How often do you begin statements inside your head or out loud that begin with words like: I know I - should, shouldn’t, need to, have to, supposed to…? These words create constriction and the illusion that you have a lack of choice. The ability to have choice and make our own decisions is an important freedom; a part of having free will and spiritual growth. Without the freedom to make choices we can feel powerless and hopeless.

Why Motivation Malfunctions at Midlife
Do you have trouble completing tasks? Do you lack organization and drive? These questions identify why so many baby boomers find it difficult to maintain their momentum through the overwhelm of their daily responsibilities. The following are several reasons why motivation falls apart and what you can do about it.

10 Tips to Reduce Stress & Guilt
Stress and guilt seem to go hand-in-hand, especially for working parents. Here are 10 Tips that can greatly reduce feelings of stress and guilt creating greater life harmony

Internal Customer Relationship Management

CRM is not just about maintaining databases, touching your external customers every so often, remembering their names, and upselling. It is so much more than that, and begins within the walls of your organization. If your internal CRM strateges are not up to snuff, chances are that your relationships with your external customers will suffer as a direct result. Learn how to enhance your internal customer service delivery plan so that the bottom line of your company stays healthy.

5 Tips to Reduce Stress & Guilt
Stress and guilt seem to go hand-in-hand. As a working parent, there seems to be plenty of both to go around! Learn to reduce them both using these 5 simple tips.

Benefits of Incentive Programs

Incentive programs are a great way for businesses to reach out to their employees in an appropriate and appreciate manner. Not only do they work to improve the livelihood of the individual worker, but they also help to improve the livelihood of the business as well. Everyone is able to take part in the success of the company and feel like they are an integral part of the company and the work which takes place inside the company.

Learn the 10 basic steps to change negative attitudes
Negative/ bad attitudes spread like viruses, from one individual to the next and can "infect" entire groups, communities and organizations. Once an attitude virus begins to spread, it becomes an epidemic in no time. Health suffers, productivity suffers, finances suffer, and the relationships suffer.

What Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle Means for You

Essentially, Heisenberg determined that the mere observation of a particle causes it to then move in an unpredictable manner. I started relating this to us. After all, aren’t we a bundle of particles? Do we, by simply observing ourselves and each other, alter our paths in surprising ways? If observing my thoughts changes my subsequent actions, then I might want to be more thoughtful about what I think. So I came up with a list of Ten Thoughts to Invite Surprising Changes to my own bundle of particles.

How About, THANK YOU?

It started with a turkey. In the early days of a start-up company I once worked for, a plump turkey was a small thank you token given to employees around the holidays. The turkey-giving practice lasted maybe three years, until the growing size of the organization necessitated its change. And while enhanced benefits emerged to replace that poultry gift, I found it amazing that the missing turkey still appeared as a resentment issue five years later in employee forums.

No One Appreciates Me
Do you frequently feel that you do so much for others, yet end up feeling unappreciated by others?

Authentic Living

You are meant to live an authentic life-a life that nourishes your soul, honors your heart, and provides you with meaning and satisfaction. A truly honest approach to your life enables you to act in empowering ways that are joyful for you. As a result, you go with the flow-letting go of guilt or worries about pleasing others who may have their own expectations of you There are certain belief systems and traditional pressures from society and family that make it more challenging to be true to your self. Following are some practices that may help you integrate a greater degree of authenticity in your daily life.

Who Else Wants To Know The Top Management Skill - Follow This Proven Technique
In the world today, as a manager you are paid to perform a number of tasks. However, you are paid to 'get things done' and as a manager that means making your staff as productive as possible. It's easy when you know how.

How to Avoid the Pitfalls of Micromanagement.

Are you constantly checking the work of your team members? Are you a perfectionist? I define micromanagement as: Often unintentionally, a micromanager delves into too much detail. Rather than allowing people the responsibility and freedom to do their job, the micromanager monitors and reviews every task. This obsession with detail causes resentment, affecting staff performance in a negative way. Micromanaging causes frustration. In the end, it can provide the impetus for staff to leave.

Entering 2008 Thriving not Just Enduring

Dear Jane, What do you mean by “endurance” and what’s wrong with it? I always thought enduring was a good thing. As we approach a new year, determined to make and keep our New Year’s resolutions (this time), I want to encourage you to resolve to thrive, not just endure. When I’m interviewed on radio or TV, I am always asked what the distinction is. I use an analogy taught to me by one of my mentors, Brandon St. John, some 25 years ago. When I saw it used in Al Gore’s, “An Inconvenient Truth,” I was both surprised and pleased.

Are you a slave to money?
If you have ever done something or gone somewhere you did not want to, just because you have paid for the tickets and could not get your money back, then you have been a slave to money. What is your relationship to money?

Ten Common Conflict Resolution Mistakes – and How to Avoid Them

Many of us struggle with finding the right approach to handling disputes and disagreements. We don’t always get it right. Sometimes our efforts at dealing with conflict only make matters worse. Whether you’re engaged in a heated debate, a stubborn disagreement, or an outright feud, you’ll need to take a strategic approach to resolving the problem. You’ll be most effective if you avoid making these common mistakes.

The Mind Body and Soul Solution to Stress
I hope to provide you with key insights into how your business can succeed without the unnecessary stress and potential burnout.

Tips on Creating New Resolutions and Personal Goals
Tips on how to make your New Year Resolutions Work and align them with your personal goals

Needs vs. Wants : A Business Owner's Biggest Struggle
As a business owner you have so many roles to play and so many things to do. Sometimes it is difficult to find the energy to do everything you need to do. You start to wonder if it's worth it and that mistake will ruin your business.

Life Transitions
End of a relationship Loss of a loved one Being downsized An empty nest Career change Generalized angst Not living your passion

Blaming Others Can Ruin Your Health
Do you know that blaming others hurts you more than it hurts the ones you are blaming? Discover how to release blame.

What Resentment Teaches You

Dear Jane, I’m so resentful I feel like I’m going to burst (or at least raise my blood pressure to dangerous levels). I don’t know what to do to let it go. Is there a process? As much as I resent feeling resentment, I am learning to accept it as one of my greatest teachers. Every time I feel it (often dozens of times daily), I have a chance to examine it for what it really is: a disguised regret. Here’s one brief example:

Are You Fulfilled

Dear Jane, How can I figure out whether I am doing what makes me happy? What are some of the symptoms of unhappiness, or must I wait for a life-threatening situation? I wrote my popular self-help book, Enough Is Enough!, to help others avoid having to go through a life-threatening situation in order to wake up to your spirit’s calling. If you are having to ask yourself if you are happy, then you probably aren’t. Perhaps you haven’t yet had the satisfaction that goes with fulfilling your spirit’s purpose, so you don’t know what benchmark to compare your feelings with. The symptoms of endurance or a less-than-thriving life are discussed in depth in my book. I will give you a short list here that you should find helpful:

Handling Change in the Workplace: Logical versus Emotional Reactions

People need time and support to adjust both logically and emotionally to change. This article explains how change can impact on staff and provides keys to help them adapt and settle into the new environment. Change can be positive if handled well or a recipe for disaster if handled poorly. Through the use of a case study, the pitfalls and negative impacts are discussed; then follows some pointers for managing change in the workplace and a practical method for accepting change on a more personal level.

Is it finally time to forgive
In order to free ourselves from the pain of anger and resentment we need to be able to forgive our self and others. The longer we dwell on hurtful situations from the past, the longer we keep our self from living fully in the present. Forgiveness is an act of kindness. An act of kindness to your self, as it leads to a sense of personal freedom.

Smart Planning For Performance Managment
If you have just designed a new performance management process for your organization or if you've made changes to an existing process, you will need to hold information sessions with all staff about the new system before implementing it. This will increase employee buy-in into the process and avoid resentment and confusion.

Perceptual Style Expert Provides Strategies for Conversations that Work
Simple differences in perspective can create chronic conflicts between two people – and drive them apart. Arguments or disagreements that start out small can fester and create serious resentment on both sides. This article highlights strategies for adjusting conversations so they provide the necessary information for both people involved – and therefore, they stop conflict before it starts.

Effective Change Management Comes Fully Inclusive
Change can be a very uncomfortable place to be. Particularly for employees, there are many times where imposed change can make them feel powerless, out of control and ultimately, this causes fear, resentment and lots of other negative emotions. There is a way to make them feel much better and keep onside the positive asset they already are...

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